Does Your Teenager Ignore You? Have You Tried Flipping the Dynamic?
You offer advice on organization and study methods, yet they don't follow through. Here’s perhaps the most universal piece of advice, the simplest to implement, and one that can have a wide-ranging impact.
There are two major components at play: the relational dynamic and their perception of you.
To flip the dynamic, ask yourself: have you started by listening to them? Do you allow them a free space to speak, give them time with you without any agenda, without goals or objectives? Have you made yourself available without them needing to ask?
Most importantly, do you think they feel understood and heard?
The next time you wonder why they’re not listening to you, maybe the first step is to ask yourself why you’re not listening to them.
Trying to reverse the dynamic can be the catalyst for a beneficial snowball effect on many levels.
The second component relates to how they perceive your competencies based on their experiences and the example you’ve set—not just in specific areas.
After all, things are not always so straightforward. However, your role, your stance, and how they perceive you and what they see as your areas of expertise will influence their willingness to listen.
On this point, there’s not much you can do aside from continuing to learn and demonstrating your know-how—but don’t expect immediate results.
Sometimes, I repeat things that parents have drilled in countless times, but they listen to me, and it brings about change.